


Promise?

by killugonwriter



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Gon you're BLINDING, Gonkillu - Freeform, JUST KISS ALREADY, KILLUA'S GOT IT BAD, Killua POV, Killugon - Freeform, M/M, Smut, Yaoi, guilty killua, the beach episode we never got
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-26 22:58:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14412324
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killugonwriter/pseuds/killugonwriter
Summary: The beach, Gon, and this desire that Killua can't stand.





	Promise?

When the sun of dawn arises, the ocean-laced air kisses me awake. A few seagulls coo in the distance, and I imagine them floating like buoys on the calm, daybreak sea. I don't have to move, I can just lie here and float on this thoughtless cloud. But when soft snoring fills my ears, a sleepy smile tugs at me.

Gon. I feel a soft rose's petals bloom in my chest. Already, he's making me feel this way.

The puffy cloud I float upon dissipates at the thought of him. Blinking, I take in Gon's body sprawled on the bed, like a starfish on a rock. I smile, a smile only saved for Gon. His face is half hidden from his plush pillow, but I stare at what I can see: the healthy flush to his cheeks, and the long eyelashes that drape over the roundness of his cheekbones. He looks so innocent, like a newborn, the sheets act as the arms of his mother.

A warmth like the tide lapping the shore washes over me. I regret knowing that I could stare at him until the sun sets again-and still not get enough.

The warm glow seeps into the gunshot-ridden holes in my heart. An assassin, a puppet of murder, should not feel these things. Disgust wells up and I look away from him. Suddenly, I remember the sensation of fresh blood on my hands, and my fingers feel sticky, sickeningly warm. I, a cold-blooded killer, do not deserve sweet, sweet Gon. His light illuminates every crack in my being, until I see everything I hope to forget. Sighing, I squeeze my eyes shut. The thought that he has stayed thus far makes me lightheaded and my head spins like a carousel. Why do you stay with me, Gon?

I don't deserve you.

At once I don't feel worthy of basking in his light, or like lying in bed any longer.

So I stand up. An ocean breeze fills the room like rainwater does to a pothole in pavement. I suck in the air hungrily, humming as I taste the saltwater on my tongue. I don't feel the carpet between my toes, but sand.

Gon moves gently in his sleep, his breathing even. I fight the fond smile threatening to resurface. How pathetic I have become. Instead of wallowing in my feelings, I distract myself by thinking about how Gon wanted to go to the beach today. He had talked about how much swimming he used to do at Whale Island. Gon, surrounded by fisherman tossing their lures into the water, stretched out under the beating sun. He must miss it, must be itching to get into the water again, and float in the vastness of the sea.

Not wanting to wake him, I tiptoe into the bathroom with a t-shirt and swimming trunks. I may as well get ready, since he'll be bursting at the seams to hit the water.

As I change, I muddle in the feeling of how odd it is to be wearing a bathing suit again, to be doing something fun. Since when have we stopped hunting jobs- just to enjoy ourselves? My head hurts as I try to think back. It has to have been months. Since when have we become serious, so dead set on working until we have nothing left to give? I pull the t-shirt over my head, and all I register is that the fabric feels cold. When did things feel different between Gon and I? A lump forms in my throat, one that I can't swallow. I think back to all the sleepless nights spent looking upon Gon's face through the dark, because I'm too damn afraid to do it during the day. If I do, the guilt wells up inside my gut and sinks its fangs into my heart. Who am I, to dare have affection for someone who I am not worthy of? To look upon my best friend with... lust?

Now all I've done is signed us up for job after job, in hope I will distract myself from this...this... My head drops, and I stare at the tiles of the floor.

This desire I feel.

He turned into something so much more. If I woke up without him beside me, I wouldn't be able to go on. Every moment I am alive he is my everything. The one who lights up the fire in my eyes is him and only him.

It can only be Gon.

When I step out of the bathroom, there is a numbness I am all too familiar with- a feeling that arises after being reminded of my unworthiness.

But yet, Gon is awake. He blinks up at me with those big, brown eyes.

When I feel his gaze on me, I can't help but feel paralyzed, a kind of paralysis that doesn't dull me like my fear does. It awakens something in me, something sweet with an unmistakable heat to it. Something dormant that has turned active.

 A ray of sunlight beams over him, making him look like some sort of angelic being; his nightshirt drapes off of one shoulder. Not only that, but he has the most endearing case of bedhead.

I stare, I flush, am deemed breathless by his natural delicacy. I suddenly remember why he so precious, why he is everything I want and need.

I don't say a word, I can't with those eyes of deep gold fixed on mine. He shifts on the bed, and I see the smooth skin of one of his long legs, exposed since his pajama bottoms had ridden up in the night. I unconsciously wet my lips, my fingers flex as I feel the urge to touch him, to claim him as mine.

Gon, I want you.

I want it all. Your beauty, your cuteness that somehow makes my thoughts incredibly lewd.

Gon rubs at one sleepy eye. "Ne, good-morning, Killua." I bite the inside of my cheek, trying to calm the heat pooling lower and lower. He yawns cutely. Stop it, Killua.

"Morning, Gon," I say. Hopefully it doesn't sound as strained as I feel. He throws the covers off of himself and sits on the edge of the bed. I force my eyes to stay on his face instead of roaming over those legs of his.

"Beach?" He asks, tilting his head to the side. My heart swells at his childishness, it's too endearing for me to bear. And here I am, lusting over something so innocent. I'm disgusting.

"Beach," I confirm, and can't help but smile back when his face lights up. A real smile, once again, the one I save for Gon.

I try to look away from the glow dancing across him, but I can't. Gon has a kind of beauty that you can't look away from. You get scared of letting the opportunity slip through your fingers like meaningless sand.

You have to cherish every moment.

He puts me in such a daze that I only snap out of it when the bathroom door clicks behind him.

I release a breath I didn't know I was holding. It's getting worse. Gon is quickly becoming the only thing I see.

Halfheartedly, I pack some sunscreen and two towels into my backpack. I wrestle with myself as I try to keep my thoughts off of Gon. Sighing, instead, I can't help but think that I'm pathetic. 

Gon must be excited, as it doesn't take him long to emerge from the bathroom again. I pretend to be distracted, and sling my backpack over my shoulders. Gon stares at me expectantly, and I bite the inside of my cheek.

"All set," I say, and before I know it, he is out the door and in the hotel hallway. Shaking my head, I smile a little and make sure I have the room key before I shut the door behind us. There is a spring to Gon's step, and he seems to get happier the closer we become to the beach.

From the hotel lobby there is a set of stairs that leads right down to the beach, so it doesn't take us long to get there. The sand is suddenly underfoot and the warm sun wraps Gon in delicate yellow, like the petals of a daffodil. Neither of us say anything as we walk out a bit father. When he turns back to smile at me, I can see every gold fleck in eyes and I'm suddenly paralyzed again. The salty air feels balmy on my skin and I've never felt so warm. Suddenly it's all too much, and I busy myself by kicking off my sandals. Rather than staring at Gon, I stare down at my feet, instead observing the peach-colored shell that lingers near my toes.

"It's beautiful out, Killua!" Gon turns away from me and shades his eyes with his hand as he stares out beyond the waves. I'm not mesmerized by the scenery, though. I'm mesmerized by him.

"It is," I breathe out, "It's a perfect day."

Grinning, Gon wiggles his toes into the warm sand. His cute display makes my cheeks tinge pink.

"Give me your bag, Killua," Gon says, and I sling it off and toss it to him without much thought. A seagull squawks overhead. He rummages through it for a second, and pulls out one of the towels, before laying it on the sand the moment the wind dies down.

"Sunscreen time!" He chirps, and goosebumps line my arms. "We don't want you getting burned, Killua."

Shyly, I cover my skin with my arms.

"I get it, I'm pale..." Enviously, I glance over Gon's golden, muscle-taut complexion. At that, Gon frowns.

"Don't say it like that," He has a certain fondness behind his words and I look up, "You're really pretty, Killua. You look so angelic." His eyes shimmer. "Like the moon."

My heart is slingshotted into my throat at Gon's sweet, yet somewhat cheesy words. Face burning a cardinal red, I must look sunburned already. Bashfully, I sit down on the towel and turn my head away from him.

"He thinks I'm pretty..." I say under my breath, and the way it tumbles out of my mouth makes it sound all the more real.

"Of course I think you're pretty," Gon says, and I bristle in embarrassment when I realize he had heard me. My blush deepens. I can't look away from Gon, and I notice how long his eyelashes are, and how the sunlight makes them look like golden wings. "And your eyes that look like the Morning Glories in Mito's garden, and your hair that reminds me of the next-door neighbor's cat." Gon continues, and I press my lips together as my heart thumps impossibly loud in my ears.

"You're perfect to me, Killua."

A warm surge envelops me and my heart moves up to replace my eardrums. Gon thinks I'm pretty. Gon. If he thinks I'm perfect does that mean that maybe, just maybe I'm worthy of him?

Gon takes a seat next to me as the heat dwindles, leaving me with a warm glow. Gon turns to smile at me, brilliantly as ever.

"Sunscreen?"

"Sunscreen," I reply fondly.

But the thing he says next brings the heat back, even though it would be completely innocent through his perspective.

"Take off your shirt, I'll get your back, since you can't get it yourself."

The burning comes back, but this time, it's a different kind of burning, a slow burn that doesn't dwindle as easily. I bite my lip as I feel my hormones race inside. Oh, how badly I want his hands on me.

Without thinking, my hands grasp at the hem of my shirt, pulling it up. For a moment I think I imagine a dusty blush on Gon's cheeks, but I dismiss the possibility quickly. I've never been self-conscious of my body, but for some reason I am made timid by Gon's gaze on me. What if he doesn't like it?

But all thoughts are erased when Gon's eyes become half-lidded with something that couldn't possibly be real. But the second I think I see it, he covers it up, casually removing his own shirt.

He's hard-muscled yet supple, his skin holds a warm undertone that mine doesn't. The more of his skin I see, the more I want to discover.

Averting his eyes as if feeling embarrassed, I do the same when I realize I am making him feel uncomfortable. I lock my jaw and curse myself for being careless.

"Lie down on your stomach, I've got this." Despite it all, he still seems as cheeky as ever. Pressing my lips together, I oblige, wanting to do anything to hide my slowly growing excitement. Getting a hard-on from your best friend probably isn't something you want to be known.

The towel feels nice under my bare chest, and I hide my reddened face in it as I hear Gon open the cap to the sunscreen. There is a slight squelch as he puts some in his palm.

"It might be a little cold, sorry."

I don't care. I just want his hands on me. Knowing I am this far gone just by him putting sunscreen on my back is embarrassing, but nevertheless I am too desperate for contact.

Gon is tentative at first, just barely resting his hand at the middle my spine. The cold sunblock makes me shiver and I suck in air at his touch. His palm flattens as he begins to massage the sunscreen into my skin, and I bite back a small mewl of pleasure. It feels nice, just the fact that Gon's touch is involved makes it addicting. I want him to touch me more.

After a little bit, Gon must feel more settled by the fact that I haven't reacted badly. His maneuvers are a little more firm now, and I feel my swimming trunks begin to tighten. He's so warm, and his hands have a strange gentleness despite being calloused.

"Mmmm..." I moan, and Gon hesitates a moment at the noise I make. I bury my face into the towel, and quickly say something as smoothly as I can to cover my mistake up. "That feels nice, Gon."

He's uncharacteristically quiet.

Wordlessly, he moves to my shoulders, working out a knot that I didn't even know I had. His touch just feels so good. My back arches up into him without me thinking. I drown a quiet noise of pleasure into the towel when my erection grinds against the ground. It's getting harder to hide my pants as Gon slides back down my back, hands going shallowly under the waistband of my swimming trunks to get some sunscreen there. I wish I could see his expression. Does he even realize that I'm a horny, moaning mess underneath him?

"Okay!" Gon exclaims suddenly, and I startle out of my aroused daze, "I think I got it all!"

Disappointment followed by shame floods me. Had I really just gotten off that much to Gon putting sunscreen on me?

I don't move. If I stand up, Gon will see the noticeable bulge in my swimming trunks. Alarmed, I think up an excuse.

"I'm gonna stay here and let it set," I say, the panic growing quickly. "Why don't you go for that swim you have wanted so badly?"

"But Killu-"

"No buts. I'm fine where I am. Once it settles we'll go from there."

Full of panic I remain, terrified of the idea of him being stubborn and taking me with him like he usually does. My rock-hard erection twitches, and I'm even more painfully aware of how dire this situation is. Out of the corner of my eye I see something different in Gon's expression.

"Alright, Killua," he sounds a little defeated, and I try not to feel bad as I watch him turn on his heel towards the waves. When he's at the water's edge, where I deem far enough away, I sigh in relief. What would Gon had done if he saw the obvious tent in my shorts? I bristle at the thought. 

The sound of the waves eventually smooths out the kinks in my worry, and I feel myself begin to relax. I turn away from the faraway sight of Gon bobbing in the waves and apply the sunscreen shamefully to the rest of myself. I lie back down on the towel, still too pent up to join Gon. The sun lazily warms my back and suddenly I feel sleepy, my arousal a dull throb until it leaves completely. My eyes flutter close, and it is only a few moments before I am startled by the feeling of a wet hand on my shoulder.

"Gah!" I gasp, as Gon is suddenly close, too close, his hair wet and flopped down. He's impossibly cute. My face burns, pent up with the stress of my situation again.

"Haha! Sorry Killua," he straightens up, and I wish I was less awake as I watch a droplet of water weave between his tan abs. "I didn't realize you fell asleep."

I flop back down onto the towel. "Shut up, baka. I was just resting my eyes."

Gon laughs, a sweet one that I wish could could drawl on forever. "Yeah right," he grabs my hand and my heart stops, and before I know it I'm on my feet. "Swimming time!"

The light hugs the rippling muscles in his back, and I drunkenly follow him, his hand still in mine. It doesn't feel real. Maybe I'm still dreaming on the towel. Before I know it the water is lapping at my feet, and it slowly rises up my legs as we wade in deeper. He lets go of my hand, and it feels cold as it drops to my side.

"Doesn't the water feel great?" There is a beaming smile on his face and it feels like time stops, and it's just me gazing upon him. Him with his gold-brandished skin and brown eyes, dark and handsome. There is a reflection across the water, that plays with the colors of the rainbow, nowhere near as radiant as Gon. It all frames him like he is the focal point on the canvas. And, suddenly, I feel myself moving and I can't stop it.

"Killua?" I hear him say, but at the same time, I don't hear him say it at all. All I feel is his lips against mine, warm and tinged with salt. Our mouths fit together as if they were made to. That heat is back, and this time it's scathing. It drives me to want more, impossibly more, more than I feel I can ever get. My mouth presses against his, and for a terrifying moment he is still. But he doesn't pull away, and then he kisses me back, soft enough that I feel my insides melt. He tastes so incredibly good, like biting into a ripe peach. Our mouths move together, supple and gentle, and I don't realize I am crying until I pull away and see my tears on his cheeks.

His beautiful eyes stare up at me, a dark shade that I have to rip myself away from.

"Gon..." The horror suddenly builds up implausibly fast and spills over. Before I can understand what just happened am I am out of the water, running, away from him and his taste and touch that I wish never left.

"Killua! Wait!" I hear him call after me but I don't dare respond. I just kissed Gon. I couldn't stop it.

The door to our hotel room slams behind me, and I lock the bathroom door as soon as I get in it. My hands fly on the knobs of the shower, and when the water starts, I fall to my knees, and the tears begin to slide down my face.I kissed Gon. I just kissed  _Gon._  

I can't help but feel hopelessly small, my sobs wrack my body as if it is as tiny and insignificant as I feel. I'm such a disgusting freak, how dare I even touch him? And I find myself wondering for the thousandth time what I did to deserve him- all I know is that I don't. The water coming from the shower head drowns out my sniffles, but not the hesitant knock that rattles the door.

"Killua?" It's him, laced with confusion, but something sad, too.

"Please," my voice breaks, my hands icy on the bathroom tile,  _"please_  go away."

There is silence from the other side, and then a sad "okay" that rips my heart in two. I told him to go away, but my heart screams something else, too loud for me to bear.

Stay.

Eventually I peel myself off the bottom of the tub, my tears now run dry as the cold water pelts my back, removing all traces of salt and Gon's touch. I stand there until my back becomes numb, and I can only hope it will numb me until I feel nothing at all. Hopefully, the water will also wash my guilt down the drain. 

Although, when I step out, I find that sadly that's not the case. I peer out of the bathroom. The hotel room lies empty, and I don't know whether to feel relieved or worse. Pulling on a clean change of clothes, I draw the curtains shut, not wanting to see the ocean anymore. 

I try a desperate attempt to forget as I crawl into bed, disappearing under the covers. However, all I can remember is the the kiss and my lips tingle. Guilt crawls under my gut and thrashes there. 

I regret it, but at the same time, I don't. 

It's all I've been fantasizing about, since seemingly forever, and it was even better than any imagination could concoct. A blush burns me as I remember how soft his lips were, almost like silk, and how they were warm and, oh God, his taste...

"...Killua?" My thoughts die. "Are you in here?"

I don't move, as I'm too scared to. Maybe if I'm perfectly still, he won't notice me at all.

"I'm not mad."

My pulse comes alive, hammering against my ribs. How could he not be mad? Hope swells within me but I push it down, denying that he could ever feel the same way.

"I-" he pauses, and my toes curl under the comforter, "I just want to talk."

I don't know what comes over me, maybe it is the melancholy in his voice that makes me peek up from under the covers. From just beyond the door I see him there, his hair still slightly wet, color sucked from his face. He spies my gaze on him and I duck under the covers again, too ashamed to look at him any longer.

I hear his footsteps pad towards me, feel his weight shift onto the bed. My breath catches in my throat, unable to escape. I hear him sigh before he begins to speak.

"Listen, Killua..." He begins, voice wavering as if nervous, and I can't help but hope he lets me down easy. "I don't know why..." He swallows. "Why you did that, but..."

I clench the sheet in my fist.

"But...I r-really liked it, Killua."

The blankets are flung off of me as I sit up, Gon's flustered face the first thing I see. He looks so innocent and attractive that way, and I can't speak again. His lips form the words for me.

"Can we do it again?"

One moment we are there, taking in each other, and the next thing I know, it overtakes me again and Gon is pinned under me.

"Gon," I breathe out heavily, my head clouding over with the strongest want I have ever felt. "Do you," my lips hover dangerously close to his, "mean that?"

His big eyes tremble, and he's blushing a sweet pink. This all just makes him alluring beyond rationale as a single word falls from him.

"Yes."

Our lips crash together, and it's so full of desire that it almost hurts. My hand finds his and our fingers lace together, my nerves setting aflame with the same feeling from earlier, except this time, I know he wants it too. From beneath me, Gon gives a throaty moan and I'd be damned if that wasn't the best thing I've ever heard. My tongue ravishes the corner of his mouth and he lets me in, our tongues sliding against each other's lustfully and I start wondering how it all came to this. Gon's taste and the feeling of him under me makes me become painfully hard again. We pull away for air, a trail of saliva from our mouths snapping apart and dribbling down our chins.

"Gon," I look down upon him through half-lidded eyes, and absentmindedly rub his lower lip with my thumb. My voice drops down to a whisper. "I want you."

"K-Killua," his bedroom eyes peer up at me and my arousal hazes over every rational thought. "P-please."

A growl ripples my throat as I capture his lips again, lingering there for a moment, memorizing his taste. When I break away, I groan, unable to stop as I start assaulting his neck with kisses and hard sucks. Gon sighs breathily, and his scent all around me leaves me painfully addicted, my head spinning until it's out of commission.

"Ah...Killua..." His eyes squeeze tight. My ministrations reach his collarbones and I pause to nibble at the tender flesh there; his chest heaves hotly.

"Mmm.." I hum, biting down to claim him, to mark him as mine. Gon cries out, my arousal that has long since pooled at my groin pulsing. Gon's own erection grinds into mine, and it feels impossibly good. His hands fiddle with the fabric at the small of my back and instantly our shirts fall to the floor, forgotten.

His hardened, lewdly pink nipples tempt me and I give a tentative lick. Gon shudders, making a tiny sound that I want to make louder. I suck harshly on each and roll the hardened buds between my teeth. His head falls back, flushed.

"Hah-!" As lost to it all as I am, Gon's hips buck up into mine, our bulges rubbing together, fogging us with want that I never thought we would come to feel.

I continue downward, kissing over his rippling muscles that forever have had me intoxicated. Glancing up, I stare into Gon's brown eyes with everything that I feel, and his eyes don't move from mine. My fingertips slip under the hem of his shorts, pausing there. Gon's breath hitches, but then he nods shyly. I slide them off of his hips, leaving him in nothing but his cute plaid boxers. He peeks up at me through his timid blush.

"You're so cute, Gon." I stop for a moment to press our lips together, and I feel him smile against it, as if this is all he has ever wanted too. I hope this never ends.

"Killua..." He looks breathless like this, sheened with sweat and practically glowing with his own light. He's all mine, and I realize nothing in my life up until this moment can compare.

I kiss him slowly, feeling a little nervous as I pull his boxers completely down. He gives a tiny yelp that I can't help but think is endearing. Pulling back, I smirk at him teasingly as my eyes travel lower and lower, my restraint slipping even further.

Bashfully, he hides his eyes behind his hand as I wrap my hand around his shaft. After chuckling at his adorable expression, Gon hisses when I lean down to press a lingering kiss to the head of his member. My hand teasingly pumps, a firm grip that is slow and agonizing. He lets out a low moan that makes my own arousal throb.

"Ahh!" He mewls, "Killua, I need..." A lusty wail comes from him,  _"more!"_  Spurred on by his approval, I slide the tip into my mouth and Gon's back arches off the bed when I begin to suck, my hand still moving on his shaft. A loud moan comes from him, and I never imagined he would be this vocal, but I can't help but feel massively hot over it. My tongue swirls just under the tip and Gon cries out.

"Killua!" I taste precum, and I lap it up greedily.  _"Hah_ Killua, that feels so good!" My first taste of Gon makes me want more. I bob my head faster, and Gon squirms under me, his breathing hard. "I think I'm gonna..."

He cums in my mouth suddenly, the taste erotic and salty and I groan. Greedily, I swallow down every last drop. With a pop I pull my lips away from him, licking away some white that lingers on my lower lip, not breaking eye contact with the stunning boy beneath me. Deliciously red, Gon pants heavily, and he squeezes his eyes shut as he bathes in some sort of afterglow.

"You like that?" I trace a nail from his torso down to his upper thigh and he squirms. Through his innocence a coy challenge flares in his expression. Something within me is teetered farther and farther towards my limit as Gon suddenly grabs ahold of me and pins me down.

"Yeah," he whispers hotly, and I shiver when he carnally licks at the shell of my ear. "But now it's your turn."

At that moment, I realize we don't know everything about each other, even though we think we do. I never knew this side of Gon existed, but I have brought it out.

And fuck does that turn me on.

Before I can comprehend it, Gon is pulling at the waistband of my shorts, and then tugging them off. His hand slips down into my boxers, and, grabbing at my hardness, brings our lips together into a heated battle between tongues. Against his mouth I let out a guttural groan when he rubs his thumb over the head, I'm already almost at my limit. He breaks the kiss, and suddenly, my boxers are off and his hot mouth is wrapped around my length.

"Ahh! G-Gon!"

His head bobs and I can't help but throw my head back and moan loudly. Never had I thought he would be as good at this as he is. A sudden hard suck from him makes a cry escape from me, it just feels too good. I can't think as I feel the pleasure builds and builds, but I know there is something I want to do before I reach my climax.

"Gon, wait," He looks up, flushed and panting as he slides his mouth off of me. I can't help but think Gon looks incredibly alluring and I wet my lips.

"Mm?" I can't take it anymore with him looking this way as I take control again, looking into those vulgar eyes and I growl, 

"First, I want to  _fuck_  you."

Gon bites his lip timidly and it doesn't take me long to find the lube in my bedside table, something I have been hiding from Gon for the longest time. He doesn't question it. With a certain lusty gaze following my every move, I pop off the cap and spread some over my fingers. Gesturing to him, I say, "Now I'm going to stretch you."

Gon's nervousness must come back, because his eyes tremor as if frightened. I begin to question whether he knows what I intend to do. He falls back onto the bed as I move between his legs, hovering over him.

"I'll be gentle," I kiss the bridge between his eyes and pink dusts his cheeks. "I promise."

"Okay, Killua..." His words send a tremor down my spine as it reminds me this is real. One of Gon's hands sweetly brushes back a white lock of hair skimming my cheek, as he sighs back onto the bed. For the first time I realize how loud my heartbeat is.

My mouth finds his as I prod a finger at his entrance. He intakes sharply when he feels me there, and I pause for a minute to nuzzle my nose into his collarbone, an attempt to soothe him.

"Are you okay?" I breathe in his scent, trying to calm my erratic heart.

I feel him nod, and he absentmindedly plays with a tuft of my hair. "I'm alright. Keep going."

My eyelashes cast over my eyes as I push further into him, trying not to groan when I feel how hot he is inside. Gon breathes out shakily, and when my finger is completely inside I kiss at the outside corners of his eyes.

"Can I add another?" Gon makes a noise of assent and a second one follows the first. He wriggles uncomfortably for a moment. Suddenly, I hit a spongy-sort of flesh within him and out of nowhere he moans loudly.

"Killua!" His hot breath tickles my ear, "There, there!"

Now knowing his sweet spot, I teasingly brush his prostate occasionally while I stretch him, just to lessen the discomfort of my scissoring. His mewls make it almost unbearable to wait any longer.

I pull out of him, and Gon makes a childish noise of disappointment that makes me chuckle a little. However, I see his cheeks heat up when I put some more lube into my palm and spread it over my own hard member, groaning a little. I position myself at his puckered hole and he bites his lip.

"Promise?" He says.

"Promise." I say.

I thrust forward slowly and growl when his burning heat gradually envelops my length. He's so hot inside and feels too fucking amazing for this to be real. Gon makes a noise of slight discomfort and I press a kiss to his lips.

"Move," He almost orders, surprisingly hasty, as if he wants this as much as I do. And I abide by him. And once I start moving, I find I can't stop. I quickly become addicted to the feel his body around my length, his opening deliciously sucking me into him.

"Gon! Gon!"

My thrusts begin to speed up, the squelching sound of me fucking him driving me insane. It's so wet and tight, the lube drips down my member and his butt as we fuck as if in heat. Our skin slaps together and Gon begins to moan, his discomfort obviously being replaced by unbearable pleasure. His legs are entangled around my hips to drive me impossibly deeper. I angle my thrusts upward to hit his sweet spot and he gives a cry louder than I have ever heard before.

"Killua!" He yells lustfully, "Ah-Killua!  _Fuck me!"_

Spots swim across my vision, my member sliding in and out of his heat, and it's all so agonizingly good. "Gon! Fuck!" I hit his prostate over and over again and Gon's hips buck up to meet my thrusts. Gon's lewd, aroused flush to his face looks impossibly cute and that just makes me want him so much more.

 _"Harder!_  Ahhh, Killua!" Gon gasps, the bed posts knocking against the floorboards as I pound into him, driving me to the edge. The head of my member rubs dead on Gon's prostate and he gives a howl, panting as he looks up at me with those eyes of his. I'm the one making him feel like this. I just hope I won't wake up from this dream.

"Kiss me!" And when I lean down and do as he says, I can't take it anymore as my cum bursts inside him.

 _"Mmph!_  Hah!" Feeling my hot seed filling him must send him over the edge as his own thick ropes of cum shoots up and sprays over us both. 

I pull out, a string of white connecting me to him snapping. Erotically, some leaks out of his entrance and can't help but think I wouldn't mind doing what we did all over again.

 Gon's cum pools on his torso as I lick a away a delectable drop that landed on his cheek. Embarrassed, Gon covers his face with his hands and I nibble on his earlobe, just because I love making him this way. The afterglow of an incredible orgasm settles over us both, leaving us warm as if fresh out of an oven. For a moment we don't move, and just bask in the feeling of being here. And in that moment, I realize the significance of what just happened.

"Gon?"

"Yeah?"

"Does this mean..." I trail off, hiding my blush in the nape of his neck. "That you feel the same way?"

"Killua," he threads a hand in my puffy white hair, and presses a kiss to my forehead. "Don't ask stupid questions. The answer is obvious."

And I remember something else. Gon always sees what others don't at first. He cradles my face between his palms, and draws me close, until I can see the reflection of my own eyes in his.

"It's always been you, Killua."

And he kisses me, so softly that tears spring to my eyes. He draws away, "It can only be you."

I hear a seagull from somewhere far away as he draws me close. Somehow the whole day has gone by and the sunset hits his golden eyes from the glass panes, setting them alight.

"I'm sleepy." He cutely yawns, his puppy-like breath warm on my cheek. "I don't want to move. Even if we are covered in this white stuff."

And I laugh, so genuinely I can't believe it's mine.

"Shut up, baka," I instigate, flicking him on the nose. "Just go to sleep and stop whining."

Gon makes a sound, a "humph" that is muffled by my hair, but I can still feel his smile.

"Goodnight."

"Promise it will be?"

Sleepily, my mouth twitches upwards. "Promise."

My pinky winds around his in the dark, and I can say I've never imagined that Gon's heart would lull me to sleep tonight. 


End file.
